Whisper Launch Redux

THE TUBES – After a long hiatus that virtually nobody noticed or cared about, Whisper is back, with several glitches fixed and multiple issues resolved, all the while creating a whole new slew of other unrelated problems. Previous server issues have been addressed and the site is ready to move on as if nothing ever happened.

Whisper, being an insecure little thing with low-self esteem has slipped into a new brighter, happier skin to mask its utter contempt for the world. It also has learned a few new tricks, none of which it’s quite mastered, but should hopefully get better at as time moves on.

Writers Unite
One of Whisper’s primary focuses since the infamous day of its birth has been writing. Whereas we never quite had the best way for people to share and syndicate their writing before, Whisper is now WordPress-based, allowing people’s works to be found easier, and allowing for better editing and sharing options. The comment and feedback systems are also more straight-forward.

While the wretched hive of scum and villainy that is the forums continue to exist in a perpetual state of tryhard, the front page has transformed into a microblogging hub, where people can post whatever sort of writing they like, whether its merely a status update or a full-fledged article or story.

To avoid a redoubling of efforts, whatever is posted on the front page is instantly posted to the forums as well, and comments transfer over between the front page and discussion boards as well, for a more integrated time-wasting experience.

Wikified
Whisper has also ditched the old wiki that nobody ever used and has instead integrated wiki functionality into itself. The same tags you use on Wikipedia can be used here, right on the front page, and terms linked to in these wiki posts are automatically found if those articles exist. Play with it. It should work. Keep in mind that its experimental and not exactly perfect yet, like most things here, but it’s getting there.

BBCode and Video
Embedding YouTube videos on the forum was always a tremendous pain in the ass in times past, with only a select few, OCD people able to wield the unfortunate embedding tags. Now instead of being a drain on your existence, the process is merely slightly annoying. To embed a YouTube video, on both the front page and forums, simply use this tag”

[yt]the ID of your stupid video[/ yt]

The ID of course is the complicated bunch of gibberish at the end of the video URL, like so: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b3VvVK5mH_w4/b

Get Featured
Whisper’s staff will try to pay more attention to the site, if they feel like it anyway. The best stories and content will be linked on the front page for all to see, to keep it from drowning in putrid oceans of spam and lesser, unworthy articles. Will your work be deemed awesome enough to be chosen among the droning masses? Probably, since it’s a good bet you’ll be the only one posting anything worth a damn.

Images
The previous image gallery was bulky and tended to break. The new version has lost some weight, and now allows multiple image uploads so you aren’t have to share your 1000 European vacation photographs one blurry snapshot at a time.

HTML
HTML tags now work sometimes. We would tell you which ones work, but that would spoil the surprise and the adventure of finding out for yourself. Seriously, just use the BBCode.

If Wishes Were Fishes…
We would all be eating cod. In non-fish related news, these are the following features we were either too lazy or too incompetent to get to before our arbitrarily-chosen launch date:

Real-time AJAX updating on the front page: Seriously, this was working last Friday. Now it’s not. Sadface. For now, you will have to reload the page after every post, which is retarded, but for now is unavoidable without putting the launch off another 3 months until WordPress fixes its relationship issues with AJAX and they start talking to each other again. BUT IT WORKS FOR COMMENTS MKAY???

Speed everything up: From time-to-time, things are a little slow. Not sure why. We’re working on it. Don’t panic.

WYSIWYG Editor on front page: Or at the very least, a BBCode toolbar like the forums have. We actually implemented and tested one that worked, but then it broke 15 other things. This will probably be added before anything else is solved.

Everything else you bitch about from now until Doomsday: As always, you will find things to complain about. Your screen is too small to fit the page on your computer. The color scheme is now too bright instead of too dark. Why does the front page even exist? You demand the return of the wiki you never used. Nobody loves you.

These are all things we will try to address by patting you on the head and tell you that we’re working on it, and six months later, in the unlikely event we end up feeling the same way as you, will fix these issues by crashing the site again and bringing it back.

In Conclusion
Register, post, and pass it on…